Pumpkin spice hummus and AOC doubts her fiancé. What in Tarnation?
I’m back to contribute absurdity to your inbox. So without further ado…
Hello fellow Tarnations,
After disappearing more than a year ago, I’m back to contribute absurdity to your inbox. So without further ado…
Starting first with someone who has probably made me say “WIT” more than anyone else: the Twitch Congresswoman herself, AOC. No, she didn’t pretend she was handcuffed again or fall on her face when discussing foreign policy. "This time she tossed an insult straight from the 1960s at her fiancé—yes the guy she plans to spend her life with.
In her latest GQ interview, AOC told the story of her fiancé Riley Roberts expressing his intentions to get engaged. She said he must “woo” her. Fair. It continues: “Her relationship with Roberts, who is white, raised its own particular questions about identity and belonging: She wasn’t positive that an intercultural, interracial relationship would be the right fit for her.”
Yes, AOC paused before she could take her future seriously with Riley because her feelings of true love had to first duke it out with her feelings of shallow, race-obsessed progressivism. Poor Riley. What was she thinking? What in tarnation.
Next up… and this one you have to watch…
This is so ridiculous that Crist doesn’t even deserve the title of “Florida man” for it. In his desperate plea to get ahead in the polls—things aren’t looking so hot (he’s down almost 6 points)— he resorted to this.
For all the hate the media throws at DeSantis for being proud of his faith, it is quite shocking to see most outlets completely ignore this egregious clip. There’s a lot of fearmongering in politics, but comparing yourself to Jesus and your opponent to the devil is a line not typically crossed—but it makes sense: They know DeSantis will win, and they’re absolutely desperate.
Finally, my favorite store, Trader Joe’s, has crossed another line that I thought would never be crossed: They’re selling pumpkin spice hummus. Look, I love hummus—I lived in Israel as a broke college student, and it was a staple of my diet. And, I’m one of the most basic of basic Northeastern gals, so I can’t even begin to describe the joy that fills me when I have my first pumpkin spice latte in August (I physically cannot wait until September). But combining the two is abhorrent and feels like an act of colonization. What in tarnation.
That’s it. See you next time.
Sincerely,
Kassy Dillon
At least they do carry the Israeli Feta Cheese which probably the best Feta you can get in the US, to be honest.